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Earlier this year, I was feeling a little underwhelmed by much of the new fiction I had been reading. But other well-reviewed novels left me hoping for more. We are in the early months of motherhood here, an unrelenting fug of exhausting, mindless days and fraught, sleep-deprived nights.
The novel is conveyed through an extraordinary monologue as the mother, Soldier, addresses her four-year-old son, Sailor, almost in the form of a confessional. Your father kissed us both before closing the door, a guillotine severing me from my world. Now I lived in your world. It was small. Getting a baby fed, cleaned, dressed and ready to leave the house is a major strategic operation, especially when they pull off their socks more quickly than you can put them on!
There are several painful scenes involving tantrums in the supermarket, rows between Soldier and her husband in IKEA or in the car, and tussles over toys at the dreaded Mother and Toddler Group — itself a microcosm of competitive middle-class society. Nevertheless, Kilroy invests these set pieces with a rare combination of authenticity, honesty and pitch-black comedy.
The line between just-about-coping and not-coping-at-all is desperately thin. I had been talking about socialising you at the Baby and Toddler group for weeks although now apparently it was his idea. Since becoming mobile, you could undo faster than I could do. In fact, if anything, his quality of life has improved.
