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You find out that your spouse has cheated on you, or maybe you have cheated on your spouse. The life you built comes crashing down. You feel shattered, broken, forgotten, or betrayed. You wonder, What is wrong with me? Marriage is supposed to be forever. In front of God, your family, and your friends, that is what you promised.

You ask yourself if you can get past this, if you can ever trust your spouse again or be trusted again. You wonder, Do I even want to? It all feels unbearably hard and overwhelming. These statistics paint a sad picture. The reasons both men and women give for cheating are as varied and numerous as there are people on this Earth:. Though the reasons are important to understand if you decide to rebuild your marriage, there are two things that you must remember.

Ultimately, cheating is a choice; it does not happen by accident. And it is never the fault of the person who was cheated on. The Mayo Clinic suggests the following:. You may be surprised by the high percentage of couples who stay together upon discovering infidelity. However, not all those couples remained because of love. Some remained out of fear of being alone, lack of anywhere else to go, financial issues, and so on.

According to Steven D. Solomon, PhD, and Lorie J. Teagno, PhD:. Those who commit to the hard work of dealing with the devastation of infidelity, and to being a partner who owns his or her weaknesses and mistakes, have an excellent chance of not only staying together but of coming out of the process with a strong, happy, and more fulfilling long term love relationship.