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Welcome to the colorful and occasionally rambunctious world of European Portuguese slang and those words your Portuguese grandma might gasp at! But fear not! Prepare to add a sprinkle of spice to your vocab and maybe even impress—or shock—the locals on your next visit to the land of fado and football. Thanks to Practice Portuguese for several of these. Did you know Portugalist readers get access to this Portuguese language learning tool for less?
Tuga is slang for a typical Portuguese person a Portuga. This used to be a derogatory that was mainly used in the former Portuguese African colonies, but is a word that the Portuguese have decided to own. Basically, the Portuguese have a lot of expressions for how fucking hard things are.
It comes from the verb foder. Vai mamar na quinta pata do cavalo means go suck on the 5th leg of a horse. As to whether anyone actually says this, that depends on who you ask. There is a similar expression, vai mamar na cona da tia , which is a lot more offensive but maybe more suitable if there are no horses nearby.
The English equivalent of paneleiro would be something like fag or queer. Brazil famously uses the word bicha to mean queer whereas that means a queue or line in Portugal.