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Not true. Whatever their level of observance, I feel like I can discuss sex with my Jewish friends, have fun, and not be judged. Bad-ass women like Esther, Miriam, Vashti, and yes, Lilith , are empowering — even sexy. Of course, I can and have sexualized a bowl of Szechuan noodles, so I had to check in with a couple of other sex-positive Jews to get the dirty not shameful!
When Beruriah found out that she was tricked, she was furious and committed suicide, while Meir exiled himself in shame. Morbid as this story seems, Hartman feels it sends an important feminist message.
It balances the power dynamic. Seeing a woman pissed off, smashing glasses… that makes her real. Of course, ultimately, most religious texts are still written by the patriarchy, for the patriarchy. But if you read between the lines, you can find feminist messages everywhere.
For instance, there are a bunch of Torah passages commanding men to make sure they sexually please their wives in bed, and that consent must always be present and in the verbal form of an enthusiastic yes. As a sexual assault prevention advocate, I was super stoked to read this. Rivkah Standig, a pansexual Reform woman who also identifies as a Jewitch , agrees with Yael. She feels very supported in Reform Judaism, and less so in Conservative and Orthodox settings.